No Thief Like Fear

Apparently, fear is not something I am good at overcoming. It has gripped and overwhelmed me on several occasions over the course of the last few days. Just when I think I have loosed the chains that bind me to my fears, I am afraid. And I do not believe I am alone in the matter. Nor do I believe that I am characteristically a fearful person. Rather, I find that I am periodically captured by the thief of fear. It steals my joy, my rest, my mental energy, and my trust in the Lord. My fear is impatient. My fear is seemingly realistic. My fear is not quieted by a simple "Don't worry."

And yet, the Lord knows and is compassionate.

In fact, the most common command in Scripture is "Do not be afraid." It occurs over three hundred times. These words are often said so casually, so frequently, so meaninglessly. But God's words carry so much more weight than that of my own, my husband's, my family's, or my friend's. In Ed Welch's book Running Scared: Fear, Worry, and the God of Rest, he says this regarding God's words "Do not be afraid":

Think about them. God never says anything just to get you off his back. The sheer number of times he speaks to your fears says that he cares much more than you know. He is not so busy that he attends only to macro-level concerns. Instead, he is closer and speaks to the details of your troubles."

This thought is both reassuring and unconvincing at the same time. Know why? Because my fear doesn't listen to reason. I will listen to my fear over the voice of God most of the time. Welch goes on to state, "Fear has tried God and God didn't work. To reconsider God goes against fear's manic style." Is it any wonder why God wants fear to stay out of our lives? Fear causes us to ignore the promises of God!

So what do I do with my fears? I don't rightly know. I am still trying to figure this out. I am anxious to read more of Welch's book and see what Scripture has to say about fear. For now I know that the more time I spend reading Scripture, the less time I have to think about fear. And God calls me to trust in Him when I am afraid (Ps. 56:3).

So I continue to ask the Lord to give me rest in Him and trust Him when I lay Olivia down each night in her room. Nathanael and I pray that the monitor system and locks do not fail to keep her safe while she sleeps. We ask the Lord to help us trust Him with our lives and hers. And then we sleep-knowing that an omniscient God loves us and desires that we be made more like His Son. We rest in Him.